ANXIETY, THE SHADOW THAT ELUDES LIFE

In today's world, anxiety has almost become an epidemic. Especially in a country like Turkey, where economic, social and psychological struggles deepen every day, the effects of this feeling are felt in every aspect of life. Many of us, like gladiators in Rome, spend each new day struggling to survive.

So what is anxiety and why does it affect us so much?

More importantly, how can we get out of this vortex?

WHAT IS ANXIETY?

Anxiety is a mental and emotional response to possible future threats or dangers.

Realistic Anxiety: This is the natural fear we feel in the face of a direct threat or danger. For example, fear during an earthquake.
Pathological (Misleading) Anxiety: Unnecessary fear that we feel when the event has not yet happened or for a situation that will not happen.

We can explain pathological anxiety with many examples from our daily lives:

“At home, my stomach hurts as the bill payment day approaches.” A friend of mine told me this recently.

It feels like the world is going to fall apart when that day comes. But in fact, the bills are paid every month, and somehow a solution is found. These kinds of worries wear us down, but most of the time we are unnecessarily exhausting ourselves.

I have a neighbor who says, “What will I do if my child doesn't do well in school?”

The child is already in kindergarten and already struggling with the stress of future exams. This anxiety affects not only her, but also the child.

Pathological anxiety does not only exist in thought. We magnify this feeling by constantly observing and comparing each other in the environment we live in. We look at our neighbor's new car and question why we don't have one. We see our friend's vacation photos on Instagram and look down on our own lives. When our anxieties become so big, we become harmful both to ourselves and to our environment.

WHY DO WE WORRY?

Uncertainty:
I had a neighbor who used to say, “You never know what will happen tomorrow.” Indeed, we live in a society struggling with problems such as unemployment, inflation and economic crisis. It becomes almost impossible to plan for the future. This uncertainty creates a constant fear in our minds.
Social Pressures:
A young woman in my neighborhood went into huge debts for her wedding, just to make her surroundings look good. Because people would talk about her wedding for years. However, this was a decision that would shake not only her economy but also that of her family. Such social pressures both increase anxiety and wear us down.
Misleading Expectations:
A friend of mine said to me the other day: “One day I will live a life like this.” She was talking about the life of a character she watched in a TV series. But in real life, those idealized lives are just a dream. The more we fail to live up to those expectations, the more anxious we become, and this disappointment can even lead to depression.
Culture of Fear:
Every day we see something bad on the news. Economic crisis, natural disasters, violent incidents... This information makes us think that we are under constant threat. This fear makes it more difficult for individuals to control their own lives.

EFFECTS OF ANXIETY ON OUR LIVES

Anxiety not only affects us mentally and emotionally; it also determines how we appear to our environment.

Our Perception in the Outside World: An anxious individual often radiates a nervous, impatient and restless energy. This has a negative impact on our relationships. People tend to avoid this kind of energy.
The way we market ourselves: On social media, we constantly try to show more and more. We hide our true feelings and try to make ourselves look different from who we really are. But this only increases the anxiety inside us.
How it affects our future: Constant worrying prevents us from taking action. Instead of realizing our dreams, we stay in place for fear of uncertainty. Worst of all, instead of living in the present, we just try to survive.

A friend of mine once said, “It seems like every day I am trying to survive, not to live.” This actually summarizes how anxiety captures us all.

WHAT CAN WE DO TO GET RID OF ANXIETY?

Although it is not possible to completely eliminate anxiety from our lives, we can take steps to reduce its effects:

Writing Our Own Story:
We need to stop measuring the lives of others. We need to focus on our own lives, not on our neighbor's new car or the perfect lives on social media.
Starting with Small Steps:
Big dreams make us anxious. Instead, it is healthier to start with small but concrete steps. For example, we can set a goal like “I will read a book this week”.
Accepting Our Feelings:
Anxiety is not a bad emotion; it can guide us when managed correctly. Instead of suppressing our feelings, we should try to understand them.
Seeking Support:
Talking to a friend or seeking professional help to cope with anxiety can strengthen us in this process.

RESULT: ANXIETY IS AN OPPORTUNITY TO TRANSCEND THE SHADOW

Anxiety may seem like a darkness that consumes us, but it can become a guide if we manage it correctly. First, we need to question the pressures our environment puts on us and build a life in accordance with our own values.

Remember, life is not lived just to show off to others. When you are at peace with yourself, you don't let anxiety take you captive. True happiness begins with accepting who you are today.

THREE BOOKS TO GET AWAY FROM ANXIETY AND GET TO KNOW YOURSELF

“Thought Power Therapy” - Louise Hay
Helping you discover the emotions that underlie your anxieties, this book teaches you the power of positive thinking.
“Find Your Own North Star” - Viktor E. Frankl
Based on his experience of survival in Nazi camps, Frankl describes the human search for meaning even in the darkest moments.
“Stop Worrying and Start Living” - Dale Carnegie
Filled with practical advice on how to manage anxiety in everyday life, this classic helps you restructure your life.

Five Films to Overcome Anxiety and Get Inspired

Inside Out
An animated masterpiece to understand how our emotions work in our inner world and to visualize ways to cope with anxiety.
The Bucket List (Now or Never)
A thought-provoking and motivating movie about the importance of living life to the fullest.
A Beautiful Mind
A true story that demonstrates the importance of overcoming mental struggles and making sense of life.
The Shawshank Redemption
A masterpiece that shows that with patience, hope and struggle, salvation is possible even in the most desperate moments.
Soul (2020)
A deep and emotional animation about how the most important thing in life is not success, but savoring the small moments.

TEN SONGS TO EASE ANXIETY AND SOOTHE THE SOUL

Don't Worry, Be Happy - Bobby McFerrin
A classic track that encourages you to let go of your worries and enjoy the moment.
Let It Be - The Beatles
A song that reminds us to go with the flow no matter what happens in life.
What a Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong
A melody full of positive energy that will make you realize the beauty of the world.
Imagine - John Lennon
A meaningful song to help you imagine a more peaceful world.
Fix You - Coldplay
An emotional work that you can find solace in when you feel lost.
You've Got a Friend - Carole King
A warm reminder of the importance of support and friendship.
Brave - Sara Bareilles
A powerful track that encourages to be brave in life.
Somewhere Over the Rainbow - Israel Kamakawiwoʻole
A song full of hope that creates a calm and peaceful atmosphere.
Here Comes the Sun - The Beatles
A harbinger of the good times that follow hard times, this song will lighten your soul.
Rise Up - Andra Day
An inspiring song that gives strength to keep fighting.